I realize something between us

After a couple of year i'm stick with him. I'd never feel despair to love him from day to day even till the end of my life. Since i'm in this circumstances,i realized something. As though we never having love affair to each other. Just like we live in our own territory. I don't know what the trial is. I'm  only could  wondering without the right answers. To think about this,it would suck my life. I don't want to inquire him more and more to give the answers. He just  simply answering me " I'm really busy". kinda defensively.

Yeah,no matter what happen,i didn't care anymore. I need to think myself before other. Isn't it.? Sometimes love is happiness,but it would be insanity when you crushed then. I'd rather live lonely without him. I admit,i'm not a perfect for him,i can't be. I'm just a shortage person. So,go on. Surely,he can find a girl who's truly deeply love after me. I don't really care at all. Absolutely, I'm not for him. 

I'm stop to write here. It's hard to reveal something that so privacy here. I just can't bear it. Not at all. I 'm really sorry for this annoying story.

The Blossom Of Love Between Me and Him

First of all..Before I'm start my words out and being too stoked..

Hye readears and viewers..

Peace be upon you and happy sunday to everyone!

Saturday,16th June 2012,it's been 4 years I've been in a relationship with him(Mr.Isz).When talking about the date,it's so worth for us as we have been declare our relationship being couple.Remembering about the moment he propose me to be her special lover in his life.Yups,i'm willing to be with him.So,yesterday is our couple anniversary.Despite it was our day,but we didn't have any planned to celebrate it.Mr.Isz have a damn of hectic time lately.Fortunately, i'm understood the circumstance of his life going on.

Apparently.it's been so long we have been together faced all the bitter and sweet,great and small obstacles that come into our life.Nonetheless,we never felt yawnful and upset to one another.Instead,the love grown deeper into our soul.We were always thinking positve and being open-minded.what take us back to the past are the memories,what bring us forward is our dreams.

Distance never separates two hearts that really care

         

This is Mr.Isz Photo..Our moment during having lunch at Tenom

Both of us hold the word of "Fidelity".We are not gonna promise to each other that we will not disappoint one another.You know why?Because at some point we will.It's so pointless.The important is we don't go away,even when we are a thousand miles away,we don't escape and we don't leave one another just because we were disappointed.That's the meaning of fidelity.I'm so gratefull to god,with the blessing,gracious and merciful we were still love each other till now and hopefully our relationship will be eternal ever after.

Even I didn't have make a special date with him,go outing and having a candle light dinner as other couple did..I'm not get myself from great frustration.Actually,I've a special gift for him..ngeee..Surprise for him.

Today,he will come to Kota Kinabalu.Driving his self from Ranau entirely make him tired.This week he would to attend the induction courses of enforcement officer.Perhaps every of his single day running smoothly.While,my excitement to give him this special gift make me impatient.Hohoho..

The last but not least..I love you Mr.Isz..Sincerely from Mrs.Ety heart..Happy Couple Anniversary..The age of our relationship has been 4 years old...haha..If we getting married since we met at the first..our son or daughter already 4 years old..never minds..One day,the days for us will come..=)

Okay dear readers..just pray for our happiness and relationship yaa..love you all..see you soon in my next entry..bye..

I Miss U Dear

                                                                              

 Hello readers and viewers..

Thanks for coming..and leave a comment.I'll hit u all back.

I'm feel lonely just now.I miss him.I'm soory dear.coz stick your formal photo here.Hehe.It nice for me.=)

He's funny...

He's adorable...

He's Sweet..

He's loving...

He's Awesome..

I love the way he can make me feel safe, love and wanted, even when he's thousands of miles away.

More about him..

i love him because he's the type of guy that would laugh when i fall, help me up, and when I'm just about to cry whisper in my ear its OK baby I've got U..hehe..*Sweet..=)

When I miss him.. I go through all our old messages because it re-mind's me that he love  me..

When I'm upset about something. I text him and he always seem to put me in a better mood..=)

           

Ok la guys..hehe..here is only just like online diary.Whatever we feel..just write.You feel better then.=)I'm sorry if i'm in Jiwang mood.Hehehe..The photo that i'd stick on the top..so great to see.I love it..Rose so romantic yaa..hehe..

Happy Engagement!

Hii everyone..

Today in my blog wall..i want to share something about my friend's wonderful day.

Last two week ago,on 4th February i'd attend Puteri Nurakmaliyani Shakira engagement day with her lovely future husband Fendy.well,Whenever we attend an engagement day, you will definitely feel that love is in the air. This feeling is felt by everyone, simply because of the engaged couple.It will be always nice for both of you to receive engagement gift with greeting and wishes that are really witness as the love grows deeper.So,here i greet and wish for engaged couple...

“As both of you look forward to wedding day, may your love be the reminder of the joy that lies ahead. Happy Engagement!”

“You’re engaged…

For all of your lives,

May you find in each other.

The friend of your heart…

The joy of your world…

The love of your life!”

“Marriage is not only the beginning of a beautiful relationship but also the end of a life long search for the other half of your soul.”

I'm so happy when this part .Hehe..Excited yaa..as the mother in law touch your hand to wear a gold ring that definitely change your status.=)so,dear my lovely friend Puteri Nurakmaliyani Shakira .God makes way for the both of you to find each other. May you get married without any trouble and have a bright future ahead of you.

 An engagement is the moment between two persons that makes them truthfully realize how significant they are to each other. This is the time to cherish. My Best Wishes are given to you. Have a very great life ahead.May your engagement be the foundation of a lifetime of happiness together.Ameen~ Congratulations!Puteri Nurakmaliyani Shakira Binti Jasirah.

FACT ABOUT LOVE!

Hello my lovely readers and viewer..

What actually,the fact blending about love?

So,let me tell you all deep inside from my heart..without writing a lot of matter here..i want you all just interpret about it from a photo that i stick here,=)haha..no matter i want talk about..because it's of course dead love indeed!

The fact is...

P/s To my dear M.Isthanny you know what..?!When you not here..I want you to know beside you is where I belong.=)

Endless Love

Hello readers and viewers..

Wow!My title today say something touching.It is about love.As long as we all falling in love with someone we ever meet.Almost of us always blow a promise to our lovely sweetheart.Actually,honestly deep from my heart i'm totally afraid to blow a promise to my love not because  i'm not confident with our relationship but i don't want to hurt my only one and me too..Everything that i've through along with him i'm appreciate it.I know this is a fate indeed.What i've write on here just for my special one Mr.Isthanny,em,i'm not often write about him in my blog.I don't know how to explain about him in a simple words.Only him know me how much i love him.So,i want to share a thousand years lyrics.That i can't explain in my simple words about it.All this lyrics just like my feeling.It's inspired me a lot.=)

 the endless possibilities of love and for love!

Heartbeats fast

Colors and promises

How to be brave

How can I love when I’m afraid to fall

But watching you stand alone

All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

I have died everyday waiting for you

Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you

For a thousand years

I’ll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still

Beauty in all she is

I will be brave

I will not let anything take away

What’s standing in front of me

Every breath

Every hour has come to this

One step closer

Special For my dear

Hello there!

I come here again.My entry today is dedicate to my dear.Isthanny..I want to say "I LOVE U SO MUCH"I'm really sorry because doesn't have time to celebrate his birthday.I'm only greet him through a call.So,to my dear,i just want to list something that always you bring inside my heart to love you so much dear..=)Just say happy belated birthday,his birthday on 11 October .But i don't have time to create a post just for him on that day.So,dear..this is sincerely from your sweetheart to you..=)

1. I love your kind heart

2. I love that you are a clean freak.

3. I love that you are very patient

4. I love that family comes first in your eyes.

5. I love that your a dreamer and your living your dream.

6. I love that you pray with me and for me all the time.

7. I love that you never go a day without saying you love me.

8. I love that you know how to makes me laugh.

9. I love that you are humble.

10. I love how you always remember the little things I say.

11. I love your cuddling.

12. I love that you watch old movies, and listen to the oldies with me.

13. I love that you are honest (maybe sometimes you are not by making surprise but that's OK. I like )

14. I love that you take the time to talk to my mom and dad

15. I love how when I am sick you always take care of me.

16. I love how you NEVER look at other women, it's like you never even notice there in the room.

17. I love that you let me decorate anything my way.

18. I love that when you want to try something new you always want to include me in it.

19. I love that after all this time you can still make my heart sink.

20. I love how I can still get butterflies in my stomach when I know you getting ready to walk in the door after a long tour.

21. I love that you always be by my side no matter what.

22. I love that we still can't get enough of each other.

23. I love you...because you are you. just that simple!

Happy Birthday Sayang...=)

Oh NO!I wAnt T o Get MArried

Hii there..Readers and viewer!

I have read something that has been famous in FB world.Huhu.Everyone say something about this.Do you know what the value of the dowry now.Nowadays,everything changes.The development of country cause the increasing in Eco.So,how about us who still hold status single but not available.Then having planning to get married.So,here i attached for you all information.Em,i'm agree with this status.But,how about my dear.MR.Isz..Hehe..Well,all of this are reasonable guys.

P/s To all guys out there,which one is your educational status.Ask your future husband,if the agree with this.But,i'm quit sure all of this is reasonable for us.Look around us.Everything is expensive right..=)hehe..(Mcm kena jual plak..)huhu..

L.O.V.E

Hello dear readers and viewer!

I'm here to write all my feeling towards word that we always find,in this world for appreciate every single of day we breath.This we called as "LOVE".

Love is like magic.And it always will be.

For love still remains.Life's sweet mystery!!Love works in ways
That are wondrous and strangeAnd there's nothing in life

That love cannot change!!Love can transform
The most commonplaceInto beauty and splendor
And sweetness and grace.Love is unselfish,Understanding and kind,
For it sees with its heartAnd not with its mind!!
Love is the answerThat everyone seeks...

Love is the language,That every heart speaks.

Love can't be bought,  It is priceless and free,
Love, like pure magic,
Is life's sweet mystery!!

I'm too worry

Dear my readers and viewers.Peace be upon to you all.How are you there..i hope everything is okay and your activities proceed very well.so long i didn't create any new entry in this site.Just because i'm really busy with my day.Doesn't have enough time to post something new here.Today,i want to share something about my feeling.I'm too worry about him.My boyfriend is admit into hospital.He having health problems.He was there two days ago until now.Her younger sister tell me about this.I'm so shocked with this news.Last tuesday,no wonder for the whole day,he doesn't send me any message or call me.

As her younger sister told me..My boyfriend having a very low heart rate.I don't know why he got such a problem.It make me feel worry about him.I can't visit him because he so far from me.Everyday,i'm just ask his condition using handphone.Fortunately,there have his mother and younger sister to see and take care him.I don't know how long he will be there.I'm always praying for his bless.God please give him patience and calmness to confront all of this.I hope he will discharge as soon as possible.May god always bless him...Amin.Ok guys..prays for him too..~~

it's all about him

This is my special entry..talking about him.My dear only one.Just call him Isthanny.Everything about him so unique for me.Today is our anniversary.We both have been together along 3 years.So,I just write on my blog..about him.Everything that I write here..come from my heart. And share to you all.sorry aa,if my entry here make you all feel so bored.The story today is about L.O.V.E!! Every girl says they can't find the perfect guy...Well..I've found the solution.they can’t find the perfect guy because I have the only one.Hehe..

 Falling in love is the best feeling ever when the one you love catches you. It's great when you actually take the time to get to know someone and find out they are simply *AMAZING*.Me and him not always see each other.He so far from me.Even I may not be able to look him in my eyes, but I can see into his soul, I may not be able to hold him close, but I hold him in my heart. Because Love has no limits.

The one bad thing about spending time with him: there's never enough of it and I miss him so much when we are not together.The first time I met him, little did I know that he had be the one I've been waiting for. He always share his problem with me.Though we may fight and have arguments, I always know that we will make it through. I will stand beside him in no matter how big the problem might be. 

When I tell him that I love him, I mean it more and more every time. I don't say it because I feel like I have to. I say it because it's absolutely true. its kinda funny,when I’m confront with problem ,with all the drama, and all the stupid things he still manage to put a smile on my face, make my heart skip a beat and make everything feel ok. Sometimes he ask me about my problem..so I said”you want to know my problem?”..i love you… i love your name… i love the way u look at me… i love your gorgeous smile you brighten my day” that's my problem...

To my dear I want to say” Loved you once, Loved you still, Always have, Always will.” 

Wish You Were Here

Hello to all of you..i comefor  this moment..i'm feel so empty..coz i don't know what i want to do..i just sit and busy online with my lappy.I take this time to say and sharing something..about my dear.I miss him so much.so i create this title..wish you were here..

I can be tough
I can be strong
But with you, It's not like that at all

Theres a girl who gives a shit
Behind this wall
You just walk through it

And I remember all those crazy thing you said
You left them running through my head
You're always there, you're everywhere
But right now I wish you were here

All those crazy things we did
Didn't think about it just went with it
You're always there, you're everywhere
But right now I wish you were here

What I'd do to have you
Here, Here, Here
I wish you were here

What I'd do to have you
Near, Near, Near
I wish you were here.

I love the way you are
It's who I am don't have to try hard
We always say, Say like it is
And the truth is that I really miss

A minutes fulfill your empty space inside your heart

Hye to all blogger..so,long i didn't fill my blog space..oo ya..before i forget..how are u all...??i know u all feel good..since clicking and view my blog...hahaa..thanks so much aa..cause spending ur time to read and click my blog..i already finish my MiLo with the biscuits..yummy..hehe..u all know..suddenly,i'm thinking about a story..very sweet story..to share with u all my sweetheart..

The story is about the blind girl...

There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.

One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she could see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend was blind too, and refused to marry him.

Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying..... "Just take care of my eyes dear." i'll always love you forever..

Sweetheart GoLd Diaries

inspire and strengthen your belief about love


Hye..To all  blogger..How are u?em,I think this is my special post to u all..thanks  cause let your fingers do the clicking for view my blog..This is confession from my heart..what I understand about love..if someone ask u all about love..what u all can give answer?did  u copy it from book,novel..or anythings.as long you can understand about love..while,for me..Everybody have something to say about love.Actually,sometimes I want to stop thinking about love.Long time ago,because of love someone leave me..Left me in tears.he shattered my heart. my soul Slowly being destroyed by his chemical. 

I know I'm not a perfect person for you.The memories made me think different. it was all a lie and every word never meant.In my mind and deep from my heart’s soul…I will find someone better than you.I locked my heart..and waiting someone that have his key to unlock my heart…Everytime,everything about love still surround my mind..

For me..deep from my heart..

  What is it with Love?

That makes me then breaks me?

When in love do I truly love?

Is it really love Or do I think that I love?

 Maybe I just love being in love

Or love the idea of being in love?

I spent my whole life chasing love.

In the end the one thing I truly love

Could just be the pursuit of love

I have heard it said

True love comes around only once in life…

I never believed that until I met you.

Until,one day i found him..

the owner of the key..

He unlock my heart..

Now,I know what true love means,

For never have I loved someone

as I love you…

Because our love is eternal

There's nothing left to say,

Except to say this one last word.

I love you more each day

My Sweetheart Isthanny

ConfessiOn Of DeHeart

hye u all..

just want to update my blog..

long time no see..really miss u all..

thanks cause still always wif me..i know u have many things to do..

but still having time to click my blog

i appreciate u all..

with my big thank u...

and big heart..

so,i will being u friend always..bestfriend forever..

even just in diz space...

just want to share something deep from my heart..

thats all my friend..

thanks being here since finished read it,..

bye..

~DeLonely Of MySoul~

Hye.blogger..
long time no see..hmm..this is my confession for u all..nothing to say..don't think its my way to take u all feel pity..no!!this is only from my heart..and my soul..coz i really feel lonely.sharing u..T.T
saya ada sebuah chenta..chenta yang saya anggap anugerah yang datang dari hati dan perasaan yang tulus dan suci..semua orang ada rasa yang sama..tapi..how to handle???everything depend kepada diri anda sendiri..
saya telah memilih sebuah chenta...dan menerima si dia sebagai chenta hati saya..tapi adakah kami bahagia???adakah saya membahagiakan si dya???adakah si dya membahagiakan saya..


tuk penchenta diluar..disini saya ingin berkongsi pendapat..mengenai chenta..
Antara perkara yang sangat perlu@tidak perlu di utamakan dalam membina chenta anda adalah...
1.Wang(sangat perlu)
2.Nafsu(Paling penting)
3.memburukkan pasangan sendiri..(Jika Takdir si dya memang buruk)
4.berskandal..(jika perlu)


Renungkan..wahai mereka yang bergelar kekasih-kekasih..
em,anyway..saya rasa lonely..just now..

even rasa lonely..but,the colourfull..still jadi peneman..dan menceriakan hidup..
I was sitting in an area surrounded by the sea ... ..and I think about my life...bila saya pandang laut yang ada di hadapan..terdetik di fikiran..rupanya masih terlalu besar..dan luas laut ney untuk di layari..saya berfikir....begitulah juga dengan hidup ini....kadang laut tue menunjukkan yang dia tenang..kadang berombak..kadang surut..begitu juga dengan hidup ini..

then,i'm thinking something..perubahan yang ada pada saya..sekarang,saya sudah berumur 21 tahun..thanks mum and dad..sebab besarkan saya..:)..bila saya ingat balik zaman kanak-kanak..macam best pulak..mcm mau jadi anak kecil..yang comel..yang banyak kawan..main banyak mainan..hahaa...so sweet..during a little girl..bergaduh,putus kawan...kawan balik..hehe...chenta tu..x lagi lah..sebab masi hingusan lagi..hehe...

tapi,masa sudah berlalu..keadaan tidak lagi sama macam dahulu..sekarang saya perlu jaga semua perasaan orang yang saya kenali..sayangi orang saya kenali..parents saya,adik-beradik,kawan-kawan yang ada bersama saya..kekasih hati yang ada bersama saya..saya perlu jaga semua perasaan mereka..tanpa memikirkan perasaan saya sendiri..yakah???baguskah macam ney..saya jaga semua perasaan orang..tp adakah orang jaga perasaan saya..well,itu tidak penting bagi saya..yang penting saya nampak kamu gembira bila bersama saya..em,for my kekasih..kita berdoa jak banyak2...semoga kita kekal..dan  di jodohkan bersama..amin...kehidupan ku ini umpama bunga..hehe..

That's all..i'm so tired..and want to sleep..daaa....

JAGA SELALU HATIMU

Untuk anda yang tersayng...jaga selalu hati anda...saya sayang betul dengan anda.....
Terima Kasih kerana selalu jaga diri ini...LoVE u My DeaR.....ISTHANNY..

~GaRdeN Of LoVe~

hye,all blogger and viewer...thanks aa...coz always with me...

what i want to share wif u all..about something..

that everyone have...

~L.O.V.E~

see and read this.....

i want to share about love story...

everything begin with love..

the story about a couple.....

the title is....

I LOVE YOU NOT

story begin

Boy: Baby, we need to talk.
Girl:dear, what do u mean?
Boy: Something has come up...
Girl: What? What's wrong? Is it bad?
Boy: I don't want to hurt you, baby.
Girl: *Thinks* Oh my God, I hope he doesnt break up with me... I love him so much.
Boy: Baby, are you there??
Girl: Yeah, I'm here. What is so important??
Boy: I'm not sure if I should say it..
Girl: Well, you already brought it up, so please just tell me.
Boy: I'm leaving...
Girl: Baby, what are u talking about?? I don't want you to leave me, I love you.
Boy: Not like that, I mean I'm moving far away.

Girl: Why? All of your famliy lives over here.
Boy: Well, my father is sending me away to a boarding school far away.
Girl: I can't believe this.
[FATHER: (Picks up the other phone, interrupts & yells furiously
ERICA!, what did I tell you about talking to boys?!!!... Get off the
damn phone!! (And hangs up).]

Boy: Wow, your father sounds really mad.
Girl: You know how he gets, but anyways, I dont want you to go.
Boy: Would you run away with me?
Girl: Baby, you know I would, I would do anything for you, but I can't... You don't know what would happen if I did. My dad would kill me!
Boy: *Sad* It's okay.. I understand, I guess..
Girl: *Thinking*I can't believe what's going on.
Boy: I need to give you something tonite, because I am leaving on
flight 1-80 in the morning, so I need to see you now.
Girl: Okay, I will sneak out & meet you at the park.
Boy: Okay, I'll meet you there in 20 minutes.
[They meet at a nearby park, they both hug eachother. And he gives
her a note.]
Boy: Here you go, this is for you. I gotta go.
Girl: *Tear* (Begins to cry.)
Boy: Baby, dont cry, you know I love you... But I have to go.
Girl: Okay (Begins to walk away.)
[They both go back home. And Erica begins to read the letter he gave her]
It says...

"Erica,

You probably already know that I'm leaving, I knew this would be better if I wrote a letter explaining the truth about how much I care about you. The truth is, is that I never loved you, I hated you so much, you are my bitch and dont you ever forget that. I never cared about you, and never wanted to talk to you, and be around you. You really have no clue how much I hate you. Now that I'm leaving I thought you should know that I hate you, bitch. You never did the
right thing, and you were never there. I didnt think I could hate someone as much as I hate you. And I never want to see you, for the rest of my life, I will never miss kissing you like before, I never want to cuddle up, how we used to. I will not miss you and that's a promise. You never had my love, and I want you to remember that. Bitch, you keep this letter because this may be the last thing you have from me. Fuck, I hate you so much. I will not talk to you soon bitch... Goodbye.
" Ricardo"

[ Erica begins to cry, she throws the paper in tha garbage & crys for hours ]
... A day passes, she is sad, depressed and she feels so lonely... Then she gets a phone call....

Friend: How are you feeling?
Girl: I just cant believe this happened.. I thought he loved me.
Friend: Oh, about that. Ricardo left me a message. A few days ago. He told me to tell you to look in your jacket pocket or something...
Girl: Umm.. okay.

[She finds a piece of paper in the jacket,
It says:
"Baby I hope you find this before you read my letter. I knew your dad might read it, so I switched a few words...
Hate = Love
Never = Always
Bitch = Baby
Will not= will

... I hope you didn't take that seriously because I love you with all my heart, and it was so hard to let you go thats why I wanted you to run away with me... -Ricardo"]
Girl: Oh my God! It's a letter.. Ricardo does love me!!, he must of slipped it into my pocket when he hugged me. I can't believe how stupid I am!!

Friend: lol Okay but I g2g... Call me later.
Girl: *happy*okay, bye, I'll be at home waiting for my baby to call me!

... Erica turns the T.V. on......
[Breaking news] "An airplane has crashed. Over 47 young boys died, we are still searching for survivors... This is a tragedy we will never forget, this plane was flight 1-80... it was on its way to an all boys boarding school..." the Reporter says.
[ She turns off the t.v. ... 3 days later, she kills herself, because of the fact that Ricardo was dead & she had nothing to live for... ]
... A day after that the phone rings. Nobody answers. It was Ricardo, he called to leave a message. "Its Ricardo, I guess you're not home so, I called to let you know that I'm alive, I missed my flight because I had to see you one last time. So, I hope your not worried. I am staying for good...

em,take this wipe ur tears...hehe...

thats from me...only that..i want to share feeling with u all...